I haven’t posted in a while. I ran my 1st Trail Ultra-Marathon in Oct, placed 4th female, and learned a lot. Yes, I plan on doing another haha, and another! It was a very different way to race and to train and an Ultra definitely changes you. Actually, it would be better to say an Ultra reveals a lot about yourself to yourself. It was a true confrontation with my heart and mind.
The last 6 months have brought a major lifestyle shift for me, its a quiet no frills life. No more Lululemon talk. Having raced all trail races this fall, there was no talk of “elite” corals and bib numbers. No circular discussions as to whether paleo or plant based diets are the secret to eternal youth, optimal digestive function and the best complexion. Did I need to move to a farm in the middle of “nowhere” to excuse myself from all that? No. Haha, but it did bring about a lot of change in perspective and I am grateful for it.
The world is beautiful, horrifying and constantly changing. There is nothing more mind numbing than listening to someone talk about their weight…ahem, NOT just women. Let’s not assume that weight and body image stress is unique to women.
Its not my intention to be insensitive. I am not talking about people who overhaul their lives to get healthy and get a new found freedom from that health. I am talking about the runner or fitness enthusiast that self obsesses over aesthetic minutia and lives bound by that obsession. Note- I did not say its wrong, just boring.
People are so interesting, I love to talk to other athletes about training, nutrition and ideas. Time spent perseverating over 5 pounds could be time spent petting a dog or cat and telling them you love them, reaching out to someone to say something nice, or heck take a nap.
I am actually embarrassed by my own past attachment to looking like a “runner”…haha and I run quite a bit and have for 25 years, so how could I not look like a runner? That was my small minded choice to be discontent and compare myself to others. What a complete waste of time. A complete waste of my own intelligence seeing a different person and thinking “to be better, I should look more like that”…absurd. Its quite nice to be able to admit that and be free of it.
My opinion is: If you want to be skinny be skinny. If you want to be big and strong be big and strong. If you don’t want to change, don’t change. As adults, we choose how we want to view ourselves. Happiness and contentment are choices. Why not choose love? If weight and body image has consumed someones life to the point their relationships, work and daily life are suffering, its time to consider getting help from a professional. I think that is choosing love.
I felt compelled to share my thoughts on this after seeing a lot of blog posts on body image from all sorts of athletes. Just my 2 cents, thats all! Be the love you want to see and feel.